Here We Grow Again!

We are so excited to announce that Baby Lucky #3 will be making their debut in February 2021!

It’s been a long time since we’ve thought about adding to our family, but this past spring just felt like the right time to try and see if it could happen for us! We were definitely surprised at how fast it happened, but couldn’t be happier.

If you’ve read the blog before, you know we had a hard time conceiving our first child, Afton. It took 3 years of praying, and leaving it in God’s hands. She is our miracle baby, and it’s pretty amazing to watch her grow and become such a cool human.

With our second, Sadie, we were pleasantly surprised to get pregnant a lot quicker. It took us 3 months of trying, and I will forever be grateful that we didn’t have to wait 3 years again!

This go around, we tried a whopping one month. ONE MONTH. To say we were shocked would be a gross understatement. Ha.

I don’t know how much I’ll be updating here, but you can always follow along on Instagram: @meredithluckhaupt

[As a side note, I just want to say how happy I am that I still have so many people who reach out to me here and on Instagram about Infantile Scoliosis. I never thought I could be of help to so many, but thankful that God gave me this small platform, so that I could reach others who need some encouragement.]

Sadie

Sometimes, it’s really difficult for me to share personal parts of our lives on social media. As much as I wish I could keep my family in a bubble, I know it’s just not realistic. Also, I think that with having already shared our journey with infertility and Afton’s EOS, there are people who need to know that they aren’t alone. Having children with medical issues can be an exhausting and sometimes lonely road – but we keep on. And we hope even when the darkness can become suffocating. And we pray.

With that being said, we believe it’s time to share some news we received about Sadie back in February of this year.

As most of you may have noticed, our Sadie girl has a hard time focusing her eyes and they often will drift out. She has been diagnosed with Congenital Exotropia, which is also referred to as Strabismus. She also has Myopic Astigmatism in both of her eyes.

After having an MRI and CT scan to rule out any other possible contributing factors, all of which came back negative (Praise God!), they’ve finally given us the go-ahead for surgery on September 5th. She will be having what’s called a Bilateral Lateral Rectus Recession.

The problem is that the medial rectus muscle in both of her eyes are so tight, that they are constantly pulling her eyes outward, which then makes it difficult for her to focus. So, the surgery will hopefully weaken both muscles and then she can finally focus normally. This will be an outpatient surgery, which is a huge relief. She will still need to be put under general anesthesia.

Unfortunately, this isn’t a guaranteed fix. There is the possibility that we have to have recurring surgeries to continue the weakening of those muscles.

At this time, it’s unsure of what the future plans are, such as: glasses, patching, vision therapy, etc. It’s all contingent upon how well the surgery goes.

As strong as I’d like to think I am, I know that the only reason I can get through these times is because of a faithful God. Even though I may not understand why my babies have to go through hard things, I truly believe that God made these girls for big things. 

Please keep us in your prayers. Pray that Sadie’s eyes would be fixed, that our faith would be bigger than our fears, and that God would give the surgeon steady and sure hands.

Thank you all for following our journey – it’s definitely been quite the ride!

 

 

What Does Your Child Have And How Do You Treat It?

With Afton’s ninth cast (so crazy!) coming up on Tuesday, I thought I’d share some basic info on her diagnosis and treatment.

Afton has what is called Progressive Infantile Scoliosis (PIS). Some may also refer to this as Early Onset Scoliosis (EOS). The terms are interchangeably used. There are different forms of EOS. To keep this relatively simple, Afton has the idiopathic form which means there is no underlying cause of her spine curvature. So, when asked the question, “Will any of your other children ‘get it’?” My filtered response is, “No, they can’t ‘get it’ because my daughter has it.”  Less than 1% of children under the age of 3 have this, so the likelihood of any of our other children having PIS is almost nonexistent.

This type of scoliosis is vastly different than the scoliosis you may be familiar with that happens in children who are in their teens. Afton’s scoliosis, if left untreated, could potentially be life threatening. When a curvature over 20 degrees develops in the spine of an infant that is naturally growing at rapid speeds, it can only get worse and can impact heart and lung development. This, generally, cannot be said of adolescents and adults who are affected by scoliosis.

Because Afton is still growing, different methods of controlling/treating the curve are required.

Many have asked why we don’t brace her or go to a chiropractor for her condition. Bracing is ideal for children who have a significantly smaller curve than Afton has. This actually may be something we could do in the future, but right now, the curve is still too severe. Chiropractic care can help older kids with pain associated with scoliosis, but does not prevent the curve from getting worse in children with EOS.

So, what can be done for a child with severe PIS? Thankfully, we live close to one of the best children’s hospitals in the country who treat this disease. Our doctor is one of only a few doctors who do what is called a Mehta cast. A Mehta cast is ideal for younger children who are still growing and still have some good flexibility in their spines. The name “Mehta” comes from the doctor who invented the technique. Most Mehta casts have shoulder straps and are made of plaster and fiber glass. Because this is made of plaster, she can’t get her cast wet. No swimming, normal baths, playing in the rain, etc. If she were to get it wet, it would ruin the integrity of the cast.

A Mehta cast isn’t a for sure fix. While many have great results from a Mehta cast, others are using this treatment as a way of slowing down the worsening of the curve. Since Afton’s curvature is so severe, this is why we have chosen to cast her. So far, it has kept her spine from getting worse, which is awesome!

Unfortunately, we aren’t just treating the curve, but also rotation in her spine and pelvic tilt. A Mehta cast helps address these concerns.

Now, a Mehta cast isn’t applied like an arm cast might be applied when you break it. When Afton gets her cast applied, she is put under general anesthesia and intubated. The reason she isn’t awake for this procedure is because they need to twist and manipulate her spine to get it as straight as possible before applying the cast. They do all of this while Afton is on a casting table.

(The pictures below are examples of what it looks like when a child is casted and what a casting table looks like. It is very important for them to have her be completely still in the position they place her in before applying the cast.)

She wears each cast for 12 weeks, with a one week break in-between casts. It is the hope that while she is in the cast for those 12 weeks that she has a growth spurt that will “help” guide her spine in the position they placed her in while in the OR.

We do get X-rays every 6 months to see if there is any correction or worsening of her spine curvature. Her last set of X-rays was in April. She had started at a 79° curve when the whole process started at 9-months-old. We didn’t see any change until we got the X-rays done this past April. The curve went from 79° to 74°. While that is exciting to see, it’s not a significant amount of correction.

Another question we get asked often is how long will she need to get these casts. Honestly, we’re not sure. There are many factors that need to be considered. Our doctor needs Afton’s spine to be flexible for him to manipulate and straighten it. Also, we need to go off of recent X-rays. We actually get our next set of X-rays tomorrow, which I’m somewhat nervous about, to see if there’s any change – good or bad. If they’re good, meaning there’s no change or we got a few more degrees of correction, we will continue casting. If the curve has worsened, we may have to start talking over the different surgical options. That will have to be an entirely different post for another day – I don’t like to dwell on it for too long.

Hopefully by me sharing this information, it gives you a better understanding of her diagnosis and treatment.

If you have further questions, please message me on Facebook or DM me on Instagram.

(I wasn’t able to put the pictures in the order I wanted, so please read the captions under each photo.)

Afton in her most recent Mehta cast.

 

Example of a casting table.

Example of a child being casted.

X-ray of Afton’s spine before her first Mehta cast. 79° curve with a pelvic tilt of 17°.

X-ray of Afton’s spine after first Mehta cast was applied. Correction in cast 31° and pelvic tilt 9°.

When I Don’t Feel Like A Good Mama.

I’m hoping that maybe I’m not alone in this. That maybe you can relate, maybe even understand this feeling.

Some days, I don’t feel like I’m a good mama.

Did I just admit that? Yes, there are days where I feel like I’m doing it all wrong. It’s never just one big thing, but a whole lot of small things that make me feel this way. 

When Afton was diagnosed with Idiopathic Infantile Scoliosis, I couldn’t help but think that it was my fault. Maybe if I had held her differently, or maybe I should’ve transitioned to her crib from Rock N’ Play quicker. Maybe if I had been a better mama, this wouldn’t have happened. 

It’s these types of instances where it may have started small, that lie that I let slip in, that turned into a bigger and more hurtful lie. 

It took me a while to realize that I was entertaining these lies constantly. They were small, almost unrecognizable. I was constantly putting myself down, sowing the seeds of self-doubt about everything I was doing to take care of my baby. It just never felt like enough. 

Satan. I’ve been letting the father of lies consume and rip apart my journey of motherhood. 

Jesus. He’s the One who speaks truth and love over me and tells me I’m enough.

I know that maybe some of you remember the story in the Bible where Jesus wants the children to come to Him. He wants to pray for them and the disciples began to turn them away. In the end, Jesus tells the disciples to let them come to Him. 

He loved those little children. You know what else? I bet He loved their mama’s, too. Like, a lot.

Now, I realize that these feelings might not just go away. Honestly, you and I will still have those moments in our busy days where our kids seem like little psychos that just want to make us go crazy. Maybe you’ll yell. Maybe you’ll just turn the television on for your kids and go sit in your room for 5 minutes while you silently pray that nap time comes quick. 

I need to tell you, right now, that you are a good mama. 

You just are. Jesus knows it, I know it, and deep down, so do you. 

We can’t keep letting those lies fill our minds. They eat away at us and rob us of our joy.

I want you to remember that these lies are just that: lies. 

“”Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”” ‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭1:5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭139:14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Jesus knows us! Even before we were conceived. The lie that we aren’t enough is silly to Him. In Him, we are enough. He died for us. Not because of who we are, but because of who He is. He is love and He loves us despite what we think about ourselves as mama’s. 

So, when you’re having a rough mommy day, and your kids just aren’t behaving, or they just want icecream for breakfast, remember this. Remember what God thinks about you. Not what Satan is trying to deceive you with. 

Jesus is speaking truth over you and wants to love you up. Let Him. Rest in that thought, friend. 

Afton’s First Cast.

What a long week it has been.

I’ve been avoiding this. This writing stuff. Mostly because I wasn’t in a place to be sharing all the emotions and hard things that have happened this week. There’s definitely been some pretty low valleys, but we’ve also had some exciting mountaintop experiences. Here’s a recap!

To start off, I just want to say how super thankful I am that Children’s scheduled us early. Because Afton needed to receive general anesthesia, she couldn’t eat after midnight. For a baby, that’s tough! We’re pretty fortunate that Afton sleeps through the night, so we really didn’t need to worry about this. 

Our appointment was at 7:30am, so of course we were late (lovely Cincinnati traffic), but nonetheless, we got there around 7:45am. We got checked in and waited to be taken back. Everyone was so nice. Afton, though, wanted nothing to do with anyone wearing scrubs. We credit that to her one-year wellness visit the previous day where she received 3 shots and a toe prick. 

We had nurses, MRI, and Dr. Sturm come by to see us before casting. They all just gave us general information on what to expect from the procedure. About 8:45am, we were told to put on some yellow paper gowns, paper booties over our feet, and hair nets (I felt like I was in an episode of Grey’s) and we headed towards the OR. Unfortunately, Children’s is under some construction, so their induction room was currently non-existent, which for us meant that we couldn’t go back with Afton. They were taking her straight into the OR to administer the anesthesia. We gave our brave girl all the kisses and big hugs, and handed her to one of the nurses. 

Cue all the tears from everyone, especially mama and baby.

We were escorted back to the exam room to pick up our things, then headed out into the waiting area.

Afton was casted first, which only takes 30-45 minutes. Then, they were taking her to get an MRI of her spine. I can’t remember if I had talked about this in a previous blog post, but the reason for the MRI was to rule out any underlying causes for her scoliosis. The MRI took 45 minutes, then they took her to recovery. (We’ve since then received those results, and everything came back just fine!)

I can’t remember what time it was when we got to see her, but I can tell you the waiting felt like an eternity. While we waited, we got to visit with one of my co-workers and her family. Her little girl was having a procedure done that morning as well. I was definitely thankful for the distraction. Please keep them in your prayers as she continues to recover. We are raising some brave little girls. 🙂

We were called back to a consult room (before we could see Afton) where Dr. Sturm came in to update us on how she did during the procedure. She did great and he was very optimistic that casting Afton for at least a year, if not longer, would greatly improve the curve in her spine. He told us that her curve had been 78 degrees, but now the cast is currently holding her at 31 degrees. He hopes to retain these improvements with each cast. 

After a little more waiting, we got to see our baby girl. 

Looking back, I wish they would’ve given us the info we needed while we waited, instead of waiting until we got to see Afton in recovery. My focus was on holding my baby as soon as possible. Nothing else mattered.

She woke up from anesthesia just fine. Unfortunately, she awoke without mommy or daddy there, so she was whimpering when we walked in. It was so pitiful. I scooped her up and held her for a while. Once we felt ready, we got her dressed and headed home. 

The first 2-3 days at home were horrible. Sleeping at night was like having a newborn all over again. The cast just isn’t comfortable, and she can’t move as easy as she once did. The most frustrating part has been watching her struggle to do the things she had mastered. Rolling, sitting up, army crawling…the added weight of the cast and just the awkwardness of it has greatly hindered her mobility. We would sit next to her on the floor and she would just lay there. She would see something close by and try to roll to reach, and she couldn’t. She would get so upset, even throwing temper tantrums, because she couldn’t move. Our hearts just couldn’t handle it. These days were the darkest of valleys.

The past few days have been so much better, though. Her physical therapist came on Wednesday and was able to get her to roll and even army crawl! Who knew the power that some Cheerios could hold! Afton was a champ, and I didn’t feel one bit embarrassed for the tears in my eyes as I watched her army crawl. This mountaintop could barely contain how bright my baby was shining. ​

​

We are thrilled to have found a network of people who are going through these same trials. It’s been really helpful learning the “tricks of the trade”.

There are still things we are learning how to do daily. For example, it hasn’t been the easiest figuring out the best way to put her diaper on. This sounds silly, but it’s difficult because her cast can’t get wet/dirty. The cast also comes down pretty far at the bottom, so we have to get creative with it.  We’re constantly worried about blowouts. I never thought I’d be putting a feminine product on my baby, but I have and will continue to do so! They help tremendously with the occasional blowout (we place it in the back of her cast – who knew!?) 

It’s also been hard having a cast just because she sweats quite a bit. We had a couple of days where the weather was nice, and we were able to go outside and not worry about her sweating so much. She had a lot of fun at the zoo on one of those cooler days!

Since she can’t get wet, bath time has been interesting. She can’t get into the tub, so we give her sponge baths. We’ve purchased some long sleeve water proof bibs that she wears when it’s time to wash her hair. It seems to work really well! Josh and I are getting pretty good at it now. It definitely takes the two of us.

Now that it’s been a little over a week, it’s easier to talk about all of this. 

In some ways, it seems crazy that we have been stressed and worried about a cast being put on our baby. I mean, it’s just a cast. Plaster, molded to fit onto our child’s body. 

My child has scoliosis. She has to wear a cast. This is a big deal. 

We are stressed and constantly praying that she won’t need casted for too long, or even have to undergo surgery when it’s all said and done. 

We’re praying for a miracle. We know it can happen because we serve a God who has already given us a miracle. I get to rock that miracle to sleep every night.

Afton has been such a trooper through all of this. It’s amazing to me what she has already accomplished. I’m excited to see what else she’ll learn to do in the coming months!

Thank you for the prayers – they mean the world to us!

Orthopedic Appointment

Today was our appointment with the orthopedic doctor. His name is Dr. Sturm and he specializes in infantile scoliosis.

They started the visit with some X-rays of Afton’s back. One X-ray from the back and one X-ray from the side (both were done having her seated). It went fairly quickly, and Afton got a little stuffed animal for being so good. 🙂

Once we were back in the room, we met one of Dr. Sturm’s fellows, Dr. Larson, who asked us some background information. Things like when did we first notice the curve, any family history, etc. Dr. Larson then left to talk with Dr. Sturm about the X-rays, and then they both came back to talk over everything.

They came back to the room and showed us Afton’s X-rays.

Her spine is curved severely.

The whole thing started to feel like an out-of-body experience for me. He started to talk about how she was a good candidate for Mehta casting, how the curve was still flexible, and all I could keep saying was, “okay.” I nodded appropriately, I think, and I just kept staring at my babies X-rays and wondering why she has to go through this. You guys, the curve is so severe. I wish I was exaggerating, but I’m not.

After Dr. Sturm left the room, Dr. Larson stayed back to answer our questions, along with one of his nurses who helps in Mehta casting.

Afton will need to be casted every two months. Every time she is casted, she will be put under with general anesthesia and intubated. The cast is not waterproof. She won’t be able to swim, bathe, etc. One week before she gets her new cast, she can be cast free to get a little time without it.

The first casting will be in the next couple of weeks. While she is under, they will also be doing an MRI of her spine (to see if there is any underlying causes) and possibly a CT scan.

As of right now, the cast isn’t a fix all. They’ve had some cases where the child is casted up until 5-years-old. At that time, surgery might be something that is discussed, depending on how much progress has been made.

One of the things that we really wanted to know was if her development would be delayed in any way. Thankfully, they told us she would be totally fine. In time, she’ll learn to walk with the cast and live a relatively normal life. It’s not that she’s fragile, or you can’t play with her. So, for future reference, please don’t feel like you can’t be yourself with her. It’s still Afton, just with a new accessory. Also, we will be starting physical therapy this week.

I feel like this is a lot of information all at once, and some of this might seem a bit jumbled to you. I’m still trying to process all of it. It’s one of those things where we expected to hear this, but when we heard it from the doctor, it still came as a shock.

Thank you so much for praying for us. I know God has a plan in all of this, and we’re trusting in Him to get us through this hard time.

 

 

MRI Results

I can’t even begin to express how thankful Josh and I are for your prayers, support, and love over the last few days.

The MRI went great. I was such a hot mess leading up to the appointment all week. It definitely went better than how I had been imagining it. So many bad scenarios of which zero of them happened. Just like Josh said. 🙂

In my previous blog post, I had said the MRI was of her spine. I was mistaken. I had just assumed it was of the spine because of her diagnosis. Instead, it was of her brain. They wanted to rule out any association between spine and brain before moving forward. After having time to process, it makes sense why they needed to rule it out. Afton isn’t pulling up, hasn’t started walking, etc. I’m so glad they had the foresight to do this.

I’m happy to share that the results came back and everything is NORMAL. Praise God!

This is huge. Huge in the way that the brain isn’t associated with her scoliosis and huge in the fact that this is one less stress on this mama.

Tomorrow afternoon, we have an orthopedic appointment scheduled. The doctor who we’ll be seeing is the director of the Crawford Spine Center, which is a part of Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. I’ve done some research (obviously;) and he seems like the exact person we want taking care of Afton.

This appointment will hopefully give us a game plan on what’s next in the way of testing. Since we don’t know the severity of her scoliosis, I’m assuming there will either be X-rays or another MRI in our future. Many people have asked what they can do for Afton. I honestly don’t have that answer. I’ve researched all sorts of things they might be able to do, but since I’m such an anxious person, I’ve tried to distance myself from that topic on Google.

I also just wanted to say briefly that I’m aware that Afton’s diagnosis seems small and not particularly life-threatening as some other children’s conditions. I’m very thankful that her condition isn’t worse than it is. However, this is still a big thing for our little family, and the unknowns have me stressed beyond imagination. I know a lot of you understand, and I’m thankful for your love and prayers for us and our sweet girl.

Please continue to be in prayer for us. Tomorrow is a big day, and hopefully we’ll get a plan together and keep moving forward.

Those piggy tails, though. 🙂

Afton

I have been struggling for a few weeks on how to write what I’m about to share. I don’t even know how to begin any of it. Where do I start?  How do I express how I truly feel? Should I even share any of it? It’s too raw. It’s too painful. It’s too close to my heart.

It’s about my daughter.

Afton is such a sassy little girl. So much personality rolled up into 20lbs of pure joy. I honestly don’t think you can find a more happy, chill baby. She’s the best.

At her 9-month well check, our doctor was so happy to see how much she had grown, how smart she was, and that everything was completely right on track for her age. When she asked us if we had any concerns, we told her that we had been noticing a slight curve to her spine when she would sit. (We had previously voiced our concerns about it at her 6-month well check, and she didn’t feel worried about it.) Our doctor looked again, and told us we should get in contact with a neurologist at Children’s Hospital in Cincinnati, OH. After meeting with the neurologist, he confirmed what we had already suspected.

Afton has scoliosis.

Since that appointment with our pediatrician, we have seen the neurologist, had blood drawn (I think I’m scarred for life), and currently have two more appointments scheduled at Children’s. Thankfully, all of her tests came back normal from the blood draw.

The first biggie appointment is tomorrow. My baby has to have an MRI.

The MRI will tell us how severe the curve is, and what course of action we need to take. I could go on and on about what I’ve researched, but I’ll spare you the horrors, and hope that you’ll be praying that it won’t be worst case scenario.

The second appointment is with an orthopedic doctor. He/she will hopefully have results and a game plan for us. That appointment is next Tuesday.

I think it goes without saying that I have been a wreck about it all. You would think that having gone through so much in trying for years to conceive her, that I would have a better outlook on the fact that God can do miracles. Afton is a miracle. I know He can do miracles. I KNOW this. My heart…not so much.

I’m trying so hard to give this to Him. I’ve been trying for the past month to do it. As soon as I give it to Him, I take it back. Surely, I can do a better job, right? She’s MY daughter. But really, she’s not mine. She’s His. I just get the privilege of raising and loving her for a short time while we’re here on this Earth.

I’d like to ask you to be in prayer with us. For Afton’s health, the MRI and all that it entails, and for us.

To The New Mom.

Growing up, especially in my late teens/early twenties, I had all these great ideas of what I would do when I became a mom. Some ideas, like co-sleeping and delivering my baby naturally, just didn’t happen.

You may be sitting there, all 36 weeks pregnant, and have all the hospital bags packed, waiting by the door. You’ve carried this child for almost nine months (ten months? Who cares…it feels like 5 years, anyways), and you are FINALLY in the home stretch.

If you were anything like me, you had already thought of your “birth plan”. My plan was simple: Have. The. Baby. Straight to the point, easy to remember. Boom. And guess what? It happened EXACTLY how I wanted. Now, for some women, they legit have a “birth plan”, and that’s super cool. I’m being totally serious here. Was a birth plan for me? Not at all. The fact of the matter is, is that you’re going to have a baby. Whether you decide to get all the pain meds (I HIGHLY recommend this), or you go all natural (I’ll pray for you), the end result is BABY.

I just want you to know that whatever way you choose to go, be all in.

I remember being so unsure of myself in the last few weeks of my pregnancy. Everyone and their mother was offering “advice”. I constantly felt like my decisions were all wrong. I mean, obviously they were, right? I had never given birth to a baby. I was scared, anxious, so very much excited. I definitely didn’t want to mess up my baby’s entrance into the world.

The bottom line: Do what is good for you, your spouse, and your little miracle.

Another one of my ideas was breastfeeding my baby. It was more than an idea, really. It was my DREAM to be able to nourish my child by exclusively breastfeeding. When I had Afton, I did everything “they” tell you to do once your baby is born. We did good for the first 2-3 days. She had a great latch, and she seemed full. At her newborn appointment, we found out that she was losing weight. I was prescribed a breast pump, and by golly, I pumped my heart out. We found out that I just wasn’t producing enough to exclusively breastfeed, so we started supplementing.

Can I just tell you right now that hearing that was super hard. It almost felt like our pediatrician was telling ME that I was failing. I couldn’t provide what Afton needed, and it killed me.

It was also especially hard because this was around the time when many people on Facebook were CONSTANTLY (and still are) sharing these articles on breastfeeding. “Your Supply is Fine”, or, “10 Reasons Why Breastfeeding is the Absolute Best For Your Child”. I know you’ve seen them, too. I made those titles up (obviously) but you get the picture. I was ashamed. But why? My baby was gaining weight again, and she was happy. Too many times I let other people give me a false idea of what it looked like to be a mom. That may have been their definition, but it wasn’t mine. And that’s okay.

If there’s one thing I could say to you about feeding your baby, it’s this: Just feed them.

Whether you decide to breastfeed or formula feed, please don’t feel guilty. If it isn’t hard enough being a woman, lets throw in some major judgment on an already emotional roller coaster called motherhood.

I so badly wish I could’ve breastfed my baby, but my body couldn’t this time around. If this happens to you, don’t let it make you feel like a failure. You’re not. I promise.

One of my fave bloggers, Positively Oakes, posted this picture a few days ago. I thought it was super fitting for this post.

Many people will say that the way you’re being a mom is all wrong. Don’t believe those lies. Just don’t. We’re all trying to figure this momhood out. Everyone’s ‘hood is different. Don’t get caught up in feeling like you’re doing something wrong. You’re not.

Anyways, so many of my other ideas, I chucked out the window. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about being a new mom, it’s this:

You will sleep again.

You will get to wipe yourself with toilet paper again instead of rinsing off with a squirt bottle.

You will second guess yourself. Constantly. But don’t let those moments define who you are as a mom. That baby will still love you.

You will have the courage to “roll in the hay” with your spouse again.

You will cry. A lot. And for no reason. Those are the moments when your hubby is needed. He might even get you some chocolate. He is a good guy. Remember this.

You will fit into your pre-pregnancy clothes…and if not, go shopping. You deserve it.

You will be given all the advice in the world from everyone, even guys. They may even have good intentions when giving said advice. Do what’s best for you. Period. Don’t let others make you feel bad for your choices. This is your journey.

You will constantly be in awe of that little miracle, and you will constantly fall in love more and more everyday with your hubby. Again, he’s a good guy. The best.

 

So, you’ve almost made it, little mama bear. You’ve got this. You will be a great mom. This is your journey. Trust me, it’s difficult…but so worth it. Every second of it.

Photo Cred: Abbie Rogers Photography

Full Circle

I’ve been asked multiple times to finish my story. This journey. Today marks one year since we found out we were pregnant. Today’s the perfect day to bring it full circle. 🙂

(Pictured below are the tests I took 10-3-14. These are not new ones!)

Our sweet Afton Grace was born on May 29, 2015. She weighed 9lb.13oz. and was 22.5″ long! In my opinion, labor and delivery was pretty easy. I had a great experience, and I’m thankful that I had such amazing nurses taking such great care of me and Afton.

I pushed for an hour and a half, and gave birth to this beauty. Look at all that hair!

We had an amazing photographer come and take pictures at the hospital. We love you, Abbie! You rock.

  

We went home a couple days later and started our new life as a family of three!

The next few pictures are from her newborn session. They’re perfect!

  
  

Every month is such a blessing. We are so thankful that we’ve been given this opportunity to watch her grow and become such a vibrant little girl. Being parents is a pretty amazing thing.

One month:

Two months:

Three months:

Four months:

This journey through infertility was a long, tough road to travel. I never thought I would have to wait so long for a child, but I can honestly say God knew best.

Afton is our answer to prayer. She is living proof that miracles do happen.

They do. Period.

I’m so thankful that I started this blog and shared with all of you this journey. I feel like it’s my testimony. I have met so many women who have struggled, and I was able to be an encouragement to them and share with them about Jesus and his faithfulness.

God is good like that. 🙂

I’d like to personally thank you for sticking it out with me. I’m thankful for all the prayers and encouragement Josh and I received over the years. It truly helped us get through a lot of the harder, darker times.

Much love to you all!